Monday, October 12, 2009
Should smoking be banned inside all the building?
Most people would think about passive smoking or second smoking under environmental tobacco smoke brings lots of bad effects on nonsmoking household or nonsmoking publics. They believed that it could cause lung cancer and other diseases. So smoking should be banned inside all the building.
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This thesis statement is good but I think you should use just 1 or 2 sentences. Your main idea it's good and I like the topic.
ReplyDeleteThis is a really good topic and you hold the right opinion, it's just a little longer, so make it a little shorter is better.
ReplyDeleteLiu, I think you should remove "most people" and "they" and just state this information as a fact. That way it will be more powerful and concise.
ReplyDeletePassive smoking or second smoking under environmental tobacco smoke brings lots of bad effects on nonsmoking household or nonsmoking publics. It Is believed that it could cause lung cancer and other diseases and that's the reason why should smoking be banned inside all the building.
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